Since last night I’ve been obsessively connecting to Omegle.
It’s a simple site that just connects you to a random person, anonymously, for a conversation.
It feels like that scene in Fight Club where the narrator sits down next to Tyler on the plane. Two strangers meeting, laying out their personality and sizing each other up in just a few words, with no expectations, and — thanks to anonymity — no consequences.
Except in this case, a lot of the time Tyler just screams “COCKS”, punches the narrator, and jumps out of the window.
Still, it’s fun!
xkcd 
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: How’s your day?
Stranger: bad
Stranger: your?
You: Decent for a Monday.
You: Why bad?
Stranger: i’m tired
Stranger: all the time
Stranger: but i can’t go sleep..
You: 7..8…gonna be up late…
You: 9…10…never sleep again…
You: Or maybe it’s not your fear of Freddie Kruger that’s keeping you up
You: ok, you’re evidently not a fan of 80s horror movies
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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I’ve gotten the Pedobear ASCII art before, along with others.
I tried to play a text adventure with some people, but very few understood it. My favourite thing that everybody can get is pasting The Song of Roland, in whole or in part. Pasting Part 1, the first eighty-two (I think) laisses, I typically introduce thus: “Hi, have you heard about the treason of Ganelon?”
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You: Welcome to PacMan text adventure!
You: Four ghosts sit in a box.
You: Available options are “left” and right”
Stranger: yeah
You: A ghost exits the box.
You: It gracefully moves towards you.
Stranger: holy shit thats high tech
You: Here comes a second ghost.
You: Your move?
Stranger: oh shit i’m scared
Stranger: i don’t know what to do
You: Avaialble options are “left” and right”
Stranger: i go left
You: A ghost comes down the right side.
You: You reach a wall.
Stranger: ahh
You: Avaialble options are “up” and down”
Stranger: down
You: You don’t want to go rigth because a ghost ist here.
You: You go down and see power pellet in the distance.
You: A ghost follows you.
Stranger: hells yeah
You: A third ghost exits the box.
Stranger: oh no
You: The first ghost seems to have lsot interest in you.
You: He turned for no reason what so ever.
You: The power pellet lies to your left.
Stranger: hell yeah
Stranger: i go right
You: wtf?
You: right?
You: get hte freaking pellet
You: Wait, sorry…
You: I broke character by accident. 🙂
You: You go right.
Stranger: yes
You: Available options are “up” and “kick the machine”
Stranger: ill go up
You: You go up.
You: A ghost lies to the left of you.
You: A ghost lies to the right of you.
Stranger: hmm
You: You hear last dance with maryjane playing.
You: Available options are left or right.
You: A fourth ghost exits the chamber.
You: You think to yourself, “shoulda gotten the power pellet”
Stranger: i go left because the right ghost is a racist
You: You go left to attack the politically correct ghost.
You: He pulls out nunchucks.
Stranger: shit
You: What is your weapon of choice, sir?
You: Your weapon of choice is “shit”
Stranger: a kazoo
You: and a kazoo
Stranger: yes
You: You run the kazoo in shit.
You: rub
Stranger: ok
You: Choices are, “play the shit kazoo” or “throw shit kazoo at ghost”
Stranger: i’ll play it
You: You play the shit kazoo.
You: You smell so bad the ghost runs away and drops his nunchucks.
Stranger: hells yeah
You: The ghost grabs the power pellet.
Stranger: pshh
Stranger: he would
You: Choices are, “Attack ghost”, “get nunchucks” or “say something racist”
You: Well, he had to fight off the stench somehow.
Stranger: i’ll say something racist
You: You say, “No ghosts or niggers allowed in my bar.”
You: All four ghosts come rushing at you.
You: Except Blinky.
Stranger: hmm
You: Blinky couldnt’ give a rats ass what you say about him.
You: choices are, “piss off Blinky too”, “fight with nunchucks”, or “run away leaving shit trail”
Stranger: i’ll run
You: You run right into the other ghost behind you.
You: He grabs your arms and holds you while the other ghosts pummel you.
You: You say, “I don’t have any arms!”
Stranger: because it’s true
You: Choices are, “Grow arms”, “pee in pants”, or “kick ghost holding you”
Stranger: pee in pants
You: You pee in your pants but no one can tell… you’re yellow after all.
You: Choices are “grow arms” or “kick ghost holding you”
You: …or make up your own.
Stranger: i’ll grow ars cause thats what i do
Stranger: arms*
You: You grow arms. The ghost can now hold on to you.
You: (You should have just walked away)
You: Ghost with power pellet walks…or waddles or something towards you.
You: He taunts you with the power pellet.
You: What do you do… what do you do?
Stranger: hmm
You: You hum?
Stranger: yes
You: You hum!
Stranger: the theme to mash
You: Nothing changes.
You: Oh… in that case…
You: The ghosts look around suspiciously…afraid Mr-T will attack.
You: The ghost’s stop pummeling you.
You: A strawberry appears in the distance.
You: Then it disappears again.
You: Damn it… hate what that happens.
You: The humming works… they turn translucent and start running from you.
You: Choices are “left” and “right”
Stranger: right
You: Ghosts move either direction.
You: You chase after the racist ghost to the right.
You: You catch him and he turns into eyeballs.
You: Yum.
Stranger: hells yeah
You: Just then, a ghost cmes from above and eats you.
You: You die.
You: Game over.
Stranger: shit
You: Score: 1337
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I think I may have talked to James, the fake nigerian scamster, if he was pretending to be a girl. Ended up chatting for a good three hours to a nice student on the east coast, even tho his first comment was a porn website. Claimed to have been pretending to be a girl in his previous conversation, which seems very plausible from the rest of the conversation. Oh wait, James went on to chat normally with someone, so it wasn’t him, unless he was trying his scheme on another omegler.
Patent and Trademark Attorney, your adventures made me laugh outloud. I love how xkcd brings me in contact with such nimbly silly minds at times.
Thank you, Randall.
Oh, and for the record, I got a Brazilian, a Finn, and an asshole, before I hit on my student who sent me two pictures of his cat, and swore he would read High Fidelity on my recommendation.
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Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: asl?
You: 17/M/California
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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You: Hey
Stranger: hello
You: Men, huh?
Stranger: Yep…
You: They’re such dicks sometimes
Stranger: Selfish picks interested in their own ego standing
Stranger: *pricks
You: Exactly!
Stranger: They care little about others, but more about how they appear in the eyes of others
You: Tell me about it. My EX-boyfriend would always be embarassed about displaying his affection in public.
You: And then he’d try to be all romantic at home
Stranger: It’s not about watching out for one another, it’s about their social standings for others
Stranger: haha
Stranger: that’s very selfish
Stranger: if a guy really loved you he would have no problem doing it anywhere
You: I know, and I haven’t found one of those yet.
Stranger: because at that point he would show affection whenever he liked just to prove how much he cares about you
Stranger: and not about how much he cares about how manly he looks to those around him
Stranger: people he will never meet
You: It just really pisses me off.
Stranger: pisses me off as well
Stranger: but what can you do
You: I know. It just really frustrating.
You: it’s…
Stranger: actually, that’s not always the case
You: Oh, do tell.
Stranger: if you look at those close to you, you may find someone with all the qualities you want
Stranger: but you just never notice them
Stranger: even though they probably noticed you 😛
You: ;^)
Stranger: the problem with them is that they sometimes lack…for the lack of a better term
Stranger: the “balls” to show their affection
Stranger: They fear the rejection
Stranger: and rather than have their fantasies crushed
Stranger: they wish to keep it going
You: Especially around their dumb friends.
Stranger: even if it’s just that
Stranger: a fantasy
Stranger: It’s not really that they’re afraid of looking stupid in front of their friends, but afraid of rejection from the person they really care about
Stranger: if he could get the person he really wanted, he would probably end up not giving two shits about his friends
Stranger: maybe eventually grow some balls too
Stranger: but like I said, they lack the balls to make the first move
Stranger: and to stand out amonst the rest… Read More
Stranger: *amongst
You: It’s not that. My boyfriends are fine when we’re alone, but around others, he just parades this macho bullshit.
Stranger: heh
You: It’s not that I have trouble finding guys interested in me. It’s getting them to stay that way.
Stranger: like I said, they’re mainly interested in their own social standing with their friends
Stranger: eventually, some grow out of it
Stranger: some already matured past that state
Stranger: but those are hard to find
You: Yeah….
Stranger: Eventually you’ll find that special someone
You: You know what I hate most about my last boyfriend?
Stranger: hmm?
You: He’s vain, his games, he’s insecure, he loves me, he likes her. He makes me laugh, he makes me cry, I just don’t know which side to buy.
His friends they’re jerks and when he acts like them, just know it hurts. I wanna be with the one I know. And the 7th thing I hate the most that he does. He makes me love him.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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Stranger: Do you live in China?! 😦
You: Ah, no
You: America
Stranger: FML.
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Sometimes Omeggle reminds me of Jabberwacky, it really does.
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You: Hey
Stranger: hello
You: Men, huh?
Stranger: Yep…
You: They’re such dicks sometimes
Stranger: Selfish picks interested in their own ego standing
Stranger: *pricks
You: Exactly!
Stranger: They care little about others, but more about how they appear in the eyes of others
You: Tell me about it. My EX-boyfriend would always be embarassed about displaying his affection in public.
You: And then he’d try to be all romantic at home
Stranger: It’s not about watching out for one another, it’s about their social standings for others
Stranger: haha
Stranger: that’s very selfish
Stranger: if a guy really loved you he would have no problem doing it anywhere
You: I know, and I haven’t found one of those yet.
Stranger: because at that point he would show affection whenever he liked just to prove how much he cares about you
Stranger: and not about how much he cares about how manly he looks to those around him
Stranger: people he will never meet
You: It just really pisses me off.
Stranger: pisses me off as well
Stranger: but what can you do
You: I know. It just really frustrating.
You: it’s…
Stranger: actually, that’s not always the case
You: Oh, do tell.
Stranger: if you look at those close to you, you may find someone with all the qualities you want
Stranger: but you just never notice them
Stranger: even though they probably noticed you 😛
You: ;^)
Stranger: the problem with them is that they sometimes lack…for the lack of a better term
Stranger: the “balls” to show their affection
Stranger: They fear the rejection
Stranger: and rather than have their fantasies crushed
Stranger: they wish to keep it going
You: Especially around their dumb friends.
Stranger: even if it’s just that
Stranger: a fantasy
Stranger: It’s not really that they’re afraid of looking stupid in front of their friends, but afraid of rejection from the person they really care about
Stranger: if he could get the person he really wanted, he would probably end up not giving two shits about his friends
Stranger: maybe eventually grow some balls too
Stranger: but like I said, they lack the balls to make the first move
Stranger: and to stand out amonst the rest…
Stranger: *amongst
You: It’s not that. My boyfriends are fine when we’re alone, but around others, he just parades this macho bullshit.
Stranger: heh
You: It’s not that I have trouble finding guys interested in me. It’s getting them to stay that way.
Stranger: like I said, they’re mainly interested in their own social standing with their friends
Stranger: eventually, some grow out of it
Stranger: some already matured past that state
Stranger: but those are hard to find
You: Yeah….
Stranger: Eventually you’ll find that special someone
You: You know what I hate most about my last boyfriend?
Stranger: hmm?
You: He’s vain, his games, he’s insecure, he loves me, he likes her. He makes me laugh, he makes me cry, I just don’t know which side to buy.
His friends they’re jerks and when he acts like them, just know it hurts. I wanna be with the one I know. And the 7th thing I hate the most that he does. He makes me love him.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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@Anonymous Coward
i spoke to you last night
CAPTCHA: owners wife
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Yesterday someone began a conversation with “OH CANADA!!!!!”
I proceeded to recite the lyrics of ‘O! Canada!’
He/she/it said “UMM” and left
I also almost convinced a guy that I could see him on the video screen, but my webcam was broken so he couldn’t see me. Once he figured me out, he called me dirty hippie and left.
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You: Hello.
Stranger: hey gorl
You: Sorry?
Stranger: heyyy gorl…
You: ……..”gorl”?
Stranger: DEATH
You: So what do you think of this wobsite?
Stranger: Gorl…u tell me
You: Seriously. “Gorl”? What is that supposed to mean?
Stranger: Gorl. Shut Up
You: Only until you leave or explain what in the hell you’re attempting to say.
You: Since I know of no English word “gorl”.
Stranger: Shut Up Gorl
You: At least…not would that would work in this context.
Stranger: DEAD
You: Perhaps you are using “gorl” to refer to me?
You: But then, couldn’t “gorl” refer to anyone?
Stranger: Gorl…
Stranger: U have NO LIFE
You: Since “gorl” has no pre-established meaning, it doesn’t necessarily refer to anything at all….
Stranger: =| Gorl will you shut up already
You: Perhaps it’s merely a bit of repetative typing phlegm?
Stranger: …………………………………………………
You: Like I said, unless you leave this chat, or explain what you think “gorl” means, exactly, I will not.
Stranger: FUCKINGDEATH
You: And that. Does that have anything to do with this conversation? No. “Fucking death” doesn’t sound very pleasant, since I believe death has no appropriate sexual muscles….
You: Or physical equipment at all…..
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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You: So how’s it going?
Stranger: I’m bored. My g/f keeps playing online poker
You: As long as it keeps her mind off the raptor attacks.
Stranger: Now she asked if she’s my first love
You: Is she?
Stranger: What should I answer?
You: Flip a coin.
Stranger: I got no coin
You: Flip a card.
Stranger: No card either… I got a remote
Stranger: Can I flip that?
You: Not without losing the batteries.
Stranger: It’s taped together
Stranger: Not my first time flipping it
You: Try flipping a car, the insurance is worth more.
You: Takes more effort, I’ll admit, but it’s funny.
Stranger: I got no car.. I live in a city and have no need for one
You: Who said it has to be yours?
You: Godzilla would do it.
You: (Peer pressure from dudes in foam rubber suits!)
Stranger: I’m no freaking japanese lizard, am I?
You: …no?
You: I’m the only one, I guess.
You: Konichiwa!
Stranger: ..?
Stranger: Oh wait
You: If that was a dirty word, I’m sorry.
Stranger: I wrote that to my friends birthday packet
You: I don’t speak Japanese.
You: (Oh, snap!)
Stranger: I don’t either
Stranger: My other friend remembered 3 random words
You: Ka su don?
Stranger: Then we asked the friend what it meant
You: That’s more or less like a pork dish.
Stranger: She did know, but the sentence made no sense
You: “Have a seat in the apple-juice seat.”
You: Something like that, I guess.
Stranger: I gave her a “Single man’s cooking book”
You: A man, a can, a plan?
You: That’s a good book.
You: Washable pages.
You: Very durable.
Stranger: Just some random book
Stranger: That sounds cooler
You: It’s got some really neat recipes.
Stranger: Mine had 1/3 of the book for how to mix drinks
You: Who needs more mixes than Irish Coffee?
Stranger: That’s a fun one. Order it in Finnish bar and you never know what you’re gonna get
You: Order it on St. Patty’s day and hope like heck you’re not wearing any visible orange.
You: Could be a mickey
Stranger: You lost me there.
You: Slipping someone a mickey
Stranger: ..?
You: was how the British navy press-ganged people.
Stranger: Ok..
You: It’s a knock-out drug from back in the 18th century, used to draft sailors from bars.
You: Orange was the color of the British occupation force in Ireland
Stranger: Tell me some good melodic metal band.
You: I really have no idea.
You: An all-metal band?
Stranger: Shame. Neither have I. All I have are those that I’ve listened already.
Stranger: You don’t happen to have a spare spotify key, do you?
You: No, I don’t. Just stay away from “A Simple Plan” and it’ll be cool.
Stranger: *invite. Spotify invite.
You: Besides, how would I send it to you?
You: Which is…
Stranger: Send what now?
You: A key?
You: ::Shrugs::
Stranger: It’s just few letters
Stranger: 20 or so
Stranger: Allows free access to Spotify.
You: xkcdroflpwnsmezomgwtfbbq?
Stranger: Free service with pretty much every bands every album on stream
You: And that’s not software piracy?
Stranger: “I’m sorry. This is not a valid invitation token.”
Stranger: Nope.
You: It would surprise me if it was.
Stranger: It’s ad based program
Stranger: They show adds, you listen music
You: Sort of like Magnatune, I guess.
Stranger: Couldn’t tell.
You: That’s a neat website, if you’re into obscure genres.
You: There’s a lot of very nice Renaissance and Medieval works.
You: Choral chants from Ensemble Sretinye.
You: Original Byzantine liturgical music.
Stranger: My bunny bit my hand, now the skin is reddish and a bit sore. Don’t like that creature at all right now
You: Does this have anything to do with your girlfriend playing online poker?
You: It might have made the bunny upset.
You: Try throwing the bunny and see if she moves.
Stranger: Well… It is kinda lovely.
Stranger: I think it thought I was trying to invade it’s private spot on a carpet or something
Stranger: Got all jumpy and bit me
You: Those things need a “my territory!” sign.
You: They know we don’t have sharp noses.
You: It’s impolite to use scent markers for that sort of thing.
Stranger: Well the thing weights 4kg and is around 70cm long.
Stranger: Not a small bunny. With nice bite.
You: Is it a guard bunny?
You: Those would be hilarious.
You: Possibly deadly.
Stranger: One would think that…
You: Like in Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
Stranger: It’s not white
Stranger: And it’s too big
You: Ah, too bad.
Stranger: It’s more grayish
You: But it’s carnivorous!
You: That should count for something.
Stranger: It’s not.
You: That bunny’s a wuss.
Stranger: It doesn’t bite stuff off
Stranger: Just hurts me
You: When you stand near its carpet spot.
You: That’s harsh.
Stranger: Today, I went to give it food. I showed the food to it, then tried to put it on ground so she could eat it. Well… She thought I was taking the food away and attacked
Stranger: I got bit to my leg
You: That’s just jumping to conclusions, says I!
You: Rabbits need anger management training.
Stranger: Hmph…
You: Hopefully using large sticks.
Stranger: Well… I have been pushing it around with my leg. Maybe that’s why she hates the leg
Stranger: I mean, she tries to cut my computers wires
You: Now that’s just asking for trouble.
Stranger: I’ve already lost a speaker and 2 headsets.
You: If she electrocutes herself, she’s got no-one else to blame.
Stranger: I got pizza box covering for most of my wires
Stranger: It tries to dig her way through the box
You: Does she have any tunnels?
You: Those can help for compulsive chewing.
Stranger: In this house? Nope.
You: It works for gerbils, I know that.
Stranger: She does have some sticks and stuff like that
Stranger: But no tunnels
Stranger: The previous owner said the bunny likes those tho
You: The sticks?
Stranger: I guess we should get it some nice tunnel
Stranger: Tunnels
You: Tunnels are the bomb. They’re safe places for rabbits to hide.
Stranger: Sticks it likes too… Or did at least.
Stranger: That one doesn’t hide
You: Does it have a tunnel?
Stranger: Well…
Stranger: No
You: Circular logic for the win!
Stranger: …
You: I get five points.
Stranger: But the bunny just lays on carpet or floor and stares!
Stranger: It stares like it wants to kill me
You: Now that’s creepy.
You: Give it a tunnel before it hurts someone.
You: Preferably far from civilization.
Stranger: Also, it craps more than it eats.
Stranger: I think
You: Maybe it eats its own —
You: I don’t want to finish that thought.
Stranger: Well.. Bunnies tend to do that
You: Ruminants?
Stranger: It eats around 10% of what it craps
You: Guess you can’t beat home cooking.
Stranger: Anyway… If I had to measure in space how much that thing craps daily, I’d say maybe 3-4 dl
You: Wow.
You: I wonder if it hunts its own food.
You: I had a cat that would do that.
You: But that’s a cat
You: Bunnies don’t make good hunters
Stranger: I’ve never seen it turn away food.
Stranger: It does have all the hay it can eat, also more than enough dry food
You: Any sausage?
Connection imploded.
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Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: what part of Brazil are you from?
Stranger: rio de janeiro and you ?
You: lol
You have disconnected.
Every time. They don’t even wonder how I knew.
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You: Greetings!
Stranger: hi
You: Are you a representative of your species?
You: Can you take me to your leader?
Stranger: ?
You: I come in Reese’s Pieces (yes, we really are made from chocolate)!
Stranger: you is crazy ?
You: It depends. What is your Earthling definition of “crazy”?
Stranger: i don’t know
Stranger: haha
Stranger: you are male, female ?
You: Neither. We are a-sexual.
Stranger: o.O
Stranger: what /
You: Ah. You do not know this word? How odd. I thought all Earthlings were fluent in Earth-speak. Indeed, I am without the appropriate organs which would require me to create an….as you call it, “X-rated film”.
Stranger: you is ET ?
You: No, ET was not from my universe and a bit too interested in inter-galactic fame.
Stranger: speak portuguese? spanish ?
You: Though the movie mis-represented his call to his mothership……
You: My apologies, Earthling, but I only speak the most commonly use language.
Stranger: watching very smallville
Stranger: is that place in the universe now?
You: …..I think I must go to find a more accurate representive of the language I am using. So long. Farewell. Ahf-veed-in-sten. Goodbye.
You have disconnected.
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I’ve discovered that a great way to get people to disconnect is to ask “penny for your thoughts?”
also, on of my favorite conversations:
you: hi!
stranger: gender?
you: why?
your conversation partner has disconnected.
I couldn’t stop laughing for a while.
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You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: IT’S A TRAP
Stranger: SMOKE
You: WEED?
Stranger: CRUISE CONTROL
Stranger: YES OF COURSE
You: WHOOOA
You: YOUR LEGS HIT THE CHANDELIER
Stranger: OH GOD NOT MY THRID LEG
You: I’M A GONNA BUY YOU
You: A DRAAAAAAAANK
Stranger: DONT DO IT i’M NOT FOR RESALE
Stranger: WAIT
Stranger: WHAT DRANK
Stranger: PRUPLE DRANK?
Stranger: I LOVE PURPLE DRANK!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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So, I did end up having a nice conversation with a 50+ year old woman from the Netherlands. She’s in the IT industry and likes Unreal Tournament. This is the kind of wife I want when I’m old. 😛
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You are now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi welcome to kwik-e-mart…
You: hi
You: i’d like three waffles, please
Stranger: How can i be of assistance
Stranger: With or without syrup
You: hmm…..how about with hot sauce?
You: and I’d also like a thermonuclear device, please.
You: oh, and some sugar.
Stranger: I’m sorry we just ran out of the thermonuclear devices…
Stranger: You can visit our website and order one there..
You: darn it. any time portals or nuclear power sources? I’m not picky.
Stranger: Would you like the sugar, regular or sugar-free?
You: Sugar free would be great, thanks. And also I’d like some powdered water.
Stranger: Coming right up sir.
Stranger: How much portals can i offer you?
You: How much do they cost?
Stranger: They’re on sale, so $ 1,99 each
You: Nice! I’ll take twelve. One for each of my nephews.
You: You have great service here, I must say.
Stranger: Oh I’m sorry I only have 4 of them..
You: Well, I’ll take four, then.
Stranger: Why thank you, sir. Can I offer you anything else?
Stranger: Oh.. I almost forgot
You: The last place I shopped called the police….
You: I don’t know why.
Stranger: We have free slushies today sir..
You: Um….no, I think that’s it. What is the total price? And I’ll take a free slushie. Blueberry.
Stranger: Okay.. Let’s see… You know what.. The lot’s yours for $ 10 bucks
You: Thank you very much. A pleasure doing business with you.
Stranger: oh wait, i forgot.. Slushie’s $ 2 so.. it’s $ 12..
You: WHAT? You said it was free!
Stranger: No that wasn’t me sir.
Stranger: Perhaps you misunderstood..
You: It…wasn’t? But it looked just like you!
You: Stupid aliens.
Stranger: I said slushies aren’t free today..
Stranger: You know what sir! The slushie’s on me.. That’ll be $ 11,99 please..
You: …..???
You: Your math just blew my mind, kind sir.
You: But I’ll take it. Here’s my credit card.
Stranger: Well, because I like you, the lot costs you $ 10.. And with the administrational fees, that makes a grand total of 11,99
Stranger: Why thank you sir. One moment please.
You: And I have this coupon: “$11,99 off at Kwik-e-Mart”
Stranger: Whoops I’m sorry sir.. I accidentally typed in 119,90.. I’m terribly sorry..
Stranger: Okay.. i’ll take of 11,99
Stranger: that makes 117,- because you’re so damn kind to me today, sir
You: Can’t you re-swipe the card or something?
Stranger: No, i’m afraid the card got blocked.. It is rendered useless now.
You: Fine. I’m leaving. *snatches $15000 thermonuclear device from behind counter and RUNS*
You: Nice doing business.
You have disconnected.
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I was very pleasantly surprised by this site! My very first conversation was with a delightful Swedish traveler who also used to GM on WoW.
It was wonderful meeting someone and then leaving them behind, just the memories left to treasure.
Wander on, Swedish guy. I will always count you as a friend.
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Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello
Stranger: Hello from?:
You: I’m from heaven, I’m God.
You: How are you, my child?
Stranger: Im very well
You: Good, good.
Stranger: How about the Apocalipse?
You: I’ve been thinking about it, but I’m not sure if now would be an appropriate time..
You: Thinking about sending back my son though.
Stranger: Hmmm
You: But he’s been getting a bit arrogant as of late, I think it’s the punk rock.
Stranger: O yeah
Stranger: One more son?
You: Well, Jesus does have his pretty nifty ressurection skills, but I guess another one could be useful.
Stranger: Hmm
Stranger: God, why dont you send me a gilrfriend?
You: Ah, sometimes these types of questions pop up, but I have to refrain from simply giving you a girlfriend..
You: Simply because if I gave you a girlfriend..
You: EVERYONE else would want one.
You: And that’s a lot of work.
Stranger: That’s right…
Stranger: Do you talk with Elvis?
You: A little, he’s quite a good guy
You: He performs up here quite often
You: Got a huge fanbase
You: Ah, gotta go. My wife calling. Think she’s a bit annoyed because I supposedly gave some ‘divine protection’ to another girl.
Stranger: Ok
Stranger: God luck with Apocalipse
You: Was good talking to you, perhaps I’ll slip in a girlfriend for you sometime, see if I can get away with it.
Stranger: Please help me with the girl
You: Will try, my child.
You: Go with my blessing.
You: Bye 🙂
Stranger: Thank you…
Stranger: Bye
You have disconnected.
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Rowan if you find me, that would be cool… 😥
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Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: The game.
You: you are in a tavern. A stranger approaches you. What do you do?
Stranger: Say hello.
You: very well, he returns the introduction. He then says he has a proposition for you.
You: Will you hear him out?
Stranger: I shall.
You: He says that you look like a stout lad who would be willing to help out the kingdom by protecting this humble town from a band of evil orcs.
You: What say you?
You: of course, thered be payment
You: fame, fortune, and women aplenty
Stranger: I’m gay.
You: or men if you prefer
You: i was going to say
Stranger: Then I shall take it.
You: very well, we must leave at once!
You: there is no time to waste
Stranger: We have much work to do!
You: all the town guards are away on journeys
You: pressing journeys
You: and so this task falls on the populace
You: are you well equipped?
Stranger: We must defeat them?
Stranger: Then I am.
You: not the populace
You: well then well head out right away
Stranger: And how long will this take?
You: years
You: a long journey
You: that will see you into your maturity
Stranger: Are we there yet?
You: or not… you might be able to talk something with the orcs
You: we meet with the orc delegation
You: they are evil, but not without rules
You: lawful evil, in other words
Stranger: I see.
You: yes
You: a central orc
You: who seems to be a bit smarter than the rest
You: approaches you and introduces himself as “Gark”
Stranger: Hello Gark.
You: hello, Human
You: I have an offer
You: We will not destroy your village
Stranger: What would this offer be?
You: if you pay our ransom
Stranger: Which is?
You: ten virgin maidens
You: what do you say?
Stranger: I can arrange that.
You: ah, a man of business
You: well, we shall me up here tomorrow
Stranger: I have many powerful contacts.
You: meet*
You: very well, until then, human
Stranger: Excellent.
You: so, how do you propose to gather ten virgin maidens?
You: asks the stranger as you walk back to the town
Stranger: I shall purchase them from their fathers.
You: apparently, he doesnt seem too bothered by the offer
You: ah, good plan
You: its a good thing your diplomatic skills are so developed
You: i chose well
You: use the town’s coffers for the funding
Stranger: These are simple men
Stranger: I’m sure we can win them other with simple things
You: haha, well, they are mostly farmers
You: such as?
Stranger: A new pitchfork and some moonshine.
Stranger: For any that refuse
Stranger: The pitchfork will be a suitable murder weapon.
You: well, that works
You: and let them sample the moonshine before completing the deal
Stranger: With a powerful hidden ingrediant
You: oh?
Stranger: We will not have to spend much at all.
You: great! the governor will be most happy
You: so, shall we get started?
Stranger: Yes.
You: you visit many huts along the village’s outskirts
You: and purchase many virgins
You: some are more vocal than others
You: how do you quiet them?
Stranger: Violence.
You: of course
You: violence of what nature?
Stranger: A hard blow to the head. We must act quickly and not take any chances with these locals.
You: of course, the fate of the village hangs in the balance
You: once you attain 10 virgins, you rest up for tomorrow
You: during your sleep, one of the virgins tries to kill you
Stranger: I wake up and realise what is happening
You: what do you do?
Stranger: And deliver a swift kick to her vajayjay.
You: she falls to the ground moaning in pain
Stranger: And I tie her up and gag her.
You: thatll keep her quiet
You: ready to go to the orcs or did you have anything to do beforehand?
Stranger: I have a small amount of unfinished business.
You: ah, what sort of business?
Stranger: Sexual services.
You: i thought you werent interested in virgin maydens
You: maidens*
Stranger: Who said I was on the receiving end?
You: ah, i see
You: some powerful contracts
You: err.. contacts
Stranger: Indeed.
You: i see, well, you better hurry
You: the orcs will not wait
Stranger: I am now done.
You: ah, i see
You: thats pretty fast
You: hopefully thatll keep the mafia off your back for a while
You: so the stranger meets you at your inn along with your ransom
You: and you head out towards the area where you met the orcs the day before
You: so you arrive where the orcs agreed to meet
You: with you
Stranger: Where are the orcs now?
You: they are waiting for you
You: do you approach them?
Stranger: I do, with caution.
You: Gark meets you halfway
You: So, I see you have our ransom
You: you truly are a man of honor
Stranger: I always stay true to my word.
You: great, as do I
You: hand over the ten virgins and we shall spare the town
Stranger: Here are your virgins. Fresh and ready.
You: a bit bruised but thats still way better than our women
You: it has been good doing business with you
You: here, take this pendant
You: you are now a friend of the orcs
You: He hands you a roughly carved pendant
Stranger: I shall wear this pendant forever, your friendship is greatly appreciated.
You: haha, great friend of the orcs, human, may we meet again
You: the orcs walk away
You: towards the distant forest
You: the stranger beckons you to return to the village
Stranger: I return.
You: well, lad, on behalf of our town, I thank you
You: as promised, here is a great amount of gold
Stranger: It was my pleasure.
Stranger: This gold will be treasured for a long time.
You: as well as an official title from the king himself!
You: we, uh, have fast messengers
Stranger: What would my title be?
You: and, of course, all the young men you could hope for
Stranger: Excellent. This is what I have really been looking forward to.
You: yes, well, I shall leave you to it
You: the stranger walks away, taking the narrator with him
You: good bye, taht was fun!
You have disconnected.
Ah, that was fun. I dont have much GM-ing experience.
Captcha: PB began
Peanut Butter began as a Peanut.
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karthik says:
April 6, 2009 at 10:32 am
Best conversation I’ve had yet.
You: Hello
Stranger: hi
You: Ever wonder why nobody makes the case for atheism (or religion) by invoking Occam’s Razor?
Stranger: Nope.
You: Well, that’s that.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You can’t make a case for Religion using occam’s razor.
I’m a ch – ch – ch – ch – christian and I would never stake everything on a silly debate over some bloody pointless darwinian rubbish.
Have a nice eternity.
Bloody Darwin.
montreal first.
I Type the captchpa a lot, it seems to be pro-french this time ? that is odd. and pointless, too.
I shouldn’t HaAve Typed That.
sorry.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.
That is all . .
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Stranger: Russel?
You: yea!
You: omg
Stranger: Wrong
You: it’s you, craig!
Stranger: Russel capitalizes his sentences
Stranger has disconnected.
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I’m currently amusing myself by disconnecting anyone who can’t guess my name on their first try.
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Stranger: hi , where you from?
You: not brazil
Stranger: oh bad 😦 , i speak so litlle english :s , im from brazil 🙂
You have disconnected.
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this amazing. it reminds when IRC was the thing, back in the 90’s only way more private.
awesome
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I just realized, somebody needs to make an ELIZA for this.
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Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello
You: hi
Stranger: i’m gay
Stranger: and you?
You: good for you!
You: i’m not
Stranger: you should try it
Stranger: you will love it
Stranger: i know
You: i don’t think so
You: maybe you should try being straight, it isn’t that bad
Stranger: really?
You: truely
Stranger: wow thats awesone
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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Stranger: hi
You: Hi
Stranger: where are you from?
You: West Philidelphia
You: Born and raised.
Stranger: you like it?
You: Well, on the playground is where I spent most of my days
Stranger: ok
You: Chillin’ out, maxin’, relaxin’, all cool.
You: And shootin’ some b ball outside of school.
Stranger: well, im from brazil
You: When a cou…GOD DAMNIT!
You have disconnected.
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Long one, but it was a fun one.
Connecting to server…
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: hi
Stranger: whats up?
You: nm, stranger, hbu?
Stranger: not a whole lot
Stranger: just finding random people to talk to
You: good thing you’ve found this site then
You: anonymity makes it so much better
Stranger: haha yea it’s a life saver
Stranger: leads to some weird ass people on here though
You: so i’ve noticed, lol
You: hehheh, weird ass-people
You: seems redundant
Stranger: haha
Stranger: slightly
You: So, got your crossbow yet?
Stranger: I decided to go with the compound
Stranger: faster reload.
Stranger: can’t exactly be cocking a bolt when the zombie apocalypse finally gets here
You: well, some xbows have those nice semi-auto features
Stranger: eh. too unreliable
You: oh, zombie apocalypse?
You: thats ages away
Stranger: hope not.
Stranger: i’m getting bored
You: you’d best be ready for the higgs boson incident. thats right around the corner
Stranger: eh. that’s pussy shit.
You: Oh
Stranger: i mean, cmon, what’s the worst that happens? Existence ends?
You: naw
Stranger: i’d take that over a horde of zombie babies any day
You: worst would be that existence begins
You: existence of zombie hoards
You: so, whereabouts in canada you from?
Stranger: Michigan.
Stranger: so, Canada light.
You: heh
You: Alaska here actually, Canada plus
Stranger: nice
Stranger: actually if this zombie shit happens I’m heading your way
You: hey, don’t lead them here
Stranger: haha
You: take em thruogh the hudson bay first
Stranger: not getting all the way there
Stranger: just into the wilderness up there
You: thats alright then
Stranger: get up so they freeze
You: I’ll be island hopping in the mean time on those nice aleuts
Stranger: you know, most credible sources predict that the zombies will be capable of travelling under water
Stranger: just shambling on the bottom
Stranger: it’s good for awhile but eventually… it gets messy
You: will they be heavy enough to walk though?
You: I mean, are they like uber dense or something?
Stranger: they’ll lose a lot of their bouyancy with the whole decomposition thing
You: oh right, that little thing
Stranger: lose a lot of water and their body cavities shrink so they are more dense
You: add to that the evil personality they develop
You: and viola! neutron star
Stranger: not necessarily evil. just hungry.
You: well, evil diet
You: though, evil is all relative
Stranger: not with zombies
Stranger: then it’s just evil relatives.
You: lol
You: hoards of hungry humanitarians! oh noes
Stranger: exactly why I’m getting a compound bow
You: That reminds me, I’ve finnally completed our militia for the attack
Stranger: beautiful
You: our plan is to cut off the ice flues after luring the zombies on there with women and children
Stranger: not a terrible plan
Stranger: just keep a few breeders
Stranger: gotta have some diversity in the gene pool
You: well import
You: more diversity that way
Stranger: good plan
Stranger: just make sure you can get them
Stranger: what vehicles are you using?
You: we’ve actually succeded on attatching some jets to our snowmobiles
Stranger: hmmm
You: I know it may seem superfluous due to their slow speed, but it may help get us into Russia
Stranger: good point
Stranger: we had planned on a sit and sustain plan
You: I hear Russians plan on outlawing the zombies as soon as they make a prescence
You: so it may be safe there
Stranger: in soviet russia, zombies outlaw you.
Stranger: just remember that
You: oh crap
You: maybe japan then
You: those techies probably have some way to combat the zombies
Stranger: you really want to go to the place that invented tentacle rape when zombies hit?
You: well, they also wrote the first book on zombie defense
Stranger: true
Stranger: it’s really a double edge sword
You: everything is once you add zombies into the mix
You: even single-bladed swords
Stranger: it’s such a strange phenomona watching swords transform in the midst of zombies
You: yes, though at the same time, somehow beautiful
Stranger: it really brings a tear to my thinking about all the zombies i’m going to slaughter
You: My tears arent shed for the zombies, but for the lost time spent wasting time on sites like these
Stranger: haha god damn yes
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
oh, and what about an omegledb
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Stranger: Obama cheated
You: Really.
Stranger: he fucking cheated
You: Tell me about it.
Stranger: why is it
Stranger: that whenever Us Republicans win
Stranger: they fucking tell us
Stranger: we fucking Cheated
Stranger: but Obama
Stranger: fucking wins
Stranger: and nobody questions it
Stranger: what the fuck
You: Because everybody sucks?
Stranger: Palin 2012
You: Oh fuck
You have disconnected.
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Stranger: tell me friend, were you washed in the blood of the lamb?
Stranger: i’m talkin Jesus
You: sadly, no, my brethren for the lamb was taken by the son of the dark one
Stranger: oh my
You: yes it was most unfortunate
Stranger: must i constantly be overwhelmed by darkness?
Stranger: Lord, help me!
You: just as long as he walks the earth
You: the walker must me stopped
You: and only then will the heavens descend over the children of the high one
Stranger: cast this sinner to your gaze!
Stranger: make him suffer for his wrong beliefs
You: just as we were taught in the book of job, saint among saints, the walker only exists to tempt man
You: and as so, he must be judged
Stranger: the devil has studied scripture i see
You: and i tell you that the day will come when the judged will stand before him
You: and none will escape the summon
Stranger: such as yourself?
Stranger: are you the wheat or the chaff, the lamb or the goat?
You: such as myself you say? dont you know, only son of the high one, that something as old as the earth cannot be judged by the one who, in turn, is tide to him?
Stranger: i know where i stand, boy. do you?
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We hooked megahal up to Omegle and posted the results on robotstranger.com. It’s scary what an innocent bot will learn from random people on the internet…
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Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: whats up
Stranger: not much
Stranger: u?
You: chillin
Stranger: u a guy or girl?
You: you can guess
Stranger: guy
You: no
Stranger: really?
You: you are from the United States
Stranger: yep
Stranger: how did you guess?
You: illinois
You: because i’m omnicient
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Wow, awesome site. I just had an on and off 6 hour conversation with some drunk college kid. Pretty cool guy, I copied and pasted the conversation into Word; it ended up being 39 pages. You can meet fun people on the interwebs
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“oh, and what about an omegledb”
bought domain, working on it now
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Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hello
Stranger: i was hoping for something a little more witty
You: give me a moment…
Stranger: ok
You: GENTLEMEN!
You: I PRESENT TO YOU….
Stranger: yes?
You: THE GREATEST OF GREAT…
Stranger: oh dear this is exciting
You: THE LOLZIEST OF HILARIOUS…
Stranger: really?
You: THE MOST SPLENDIFICAL SPECTACLE THAT HUMAN EYES HAVE YET TO OBSERVIFY
You: THE WONDERFUL
You: THE FABULOUS
You: PETER!!!!
Stranger: who?
You: peter, man.
You: come on.
You: …..
You: he’s neil patrick harris’s brother…..
Stranger: you rule whoever the fuck you are
You: FUCK YEAH NEIL PATRICK HARRIS!!!
You have disconnected.
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You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: we have to move quickly
You: there’s no time to lose
Stranger: yes lets mobilize
Stranger: where to, captain>
You: you have the suitcase, right?
Stranger: check.
You: good, good
You: alright
You: now, on my mark..
Stranger: mhm
You: engage the afterburners
Stranger: *ZWEEEEOOSHHHH*
You: they don’t call this a flying boat for nothing
You: MARK
You: FWOOOOOOM
Stranger: FWOOOOOOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
You: I HAVE TO YELL NOW SO YOU CAN HEAR ME OVER THIS INCREDIBLE DIN
Stranger: WHAT?????
Stranger: I CANT LIP READ
You: I SAID I HAVE TO YELL
Stranger: YOU’VE BEEN TO HELL??
You: WHAT!?
Stranger: I THOUGHT YOU SAID
You: *SHWOOOOFFFFFF*
Stranger: YOUVE BEEN TO
Stranger: ah thats better
You: DAMN, THERE ARE SOME KINKS TO WORK OUT
You: oh sorry i just yelled in your ear there
Stranger: haah you alarmed me
You: as i was saying.
Stranger: go on
You: our target is…
You: shit! what’s our target?
Stranger: come closer
You: gunnery sergeant! what’s our target?
Stranger: i have to whisper it in your ear
You: *shifty eyes*
You: ok, tell me, you fool!
You: *moves closer*
Stranger: ok
You: there’s no time to lose!
Stranger: *whispers* i like you, captain stacy
You: !!
Stranger: ahem
You: *commander, i always suspected..! but can we..not now.not here*
You: ATTENTION
You: ENEMY APPROACHING FROM THE RIGHT
You: ?????????????????????
Stranger: MEN
You: AND WOMEN TOO
Stranger: PREPARE FOR ATTACK
Stranger: WOMEN PREPARE SANDWICHES FOR THE MEN
You: and some weird fishy things that seem androgynous to me…?
You: *slap* you filthy chauvinist!
You: *moves closer*
You: *i’ll prepare your sandwich a little later, soldier*
Stranger: *gasp* stacy…
Stranger: *leans in for awkward kiss*
You: BOOOOMMMzzzzzzzzzzzcrunch
You: oh noes!
Stranger: MAN DOWN MAN DOWN
Stranger: WE MUST KEEP FIGHTING
You: the fools!! they always strike at the most inopportune moments!
You: KEEP THAT CAMERA ROLLING, LEFTENANT!
Stranger: LOAD THE CANNONSSSSSS
You: even if we fail, our struggle goes on!!
Stranger: and bring a tripod next time
You: zomgnoes!!! it’s a…WHALE?
Stranger: MAN THE HARPOONS
You: WITH A LASER?!?!?!
You: LASERWHALE SIGHTED
Stranger: MEN!!!!!
Stranger: PULL OUT YOUR MIRRORS
You: AND IT’S GOT A GUNBLADELIGHTSABER with a HERRING on it!
You: WOMEN!
You: PULL DOWN YOUR PANTS!
You: *slap*
You: the whale just bitch-slapped me?!
Stranger: sorry, that was me
You: ah, well, i deserved it.
You: FIGHT ON YOU COWARDS
Stranger: i thought you might like the kinky abusive stuff
Stranger: CAPTAIN STACY
You: YES!
You: but you slapped me with a wet fish!
You: AHH NOOOOO THE WHALE IS BREACHING
You: HIT THE DECK
Stranger: i am sorry for that
Stranger: KERPLOW
You: no worries! i’m–
You: THUNK
You: i’m…
You: i’m ..
You: ..hit..
Stranger: STACYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
Stranger: REQUESTING PERMISSION TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS TOWARDS YOU AMIDST THIS CHAOS
You: …permission…
You: ..fusion reactor..
You: ..
Stranger: no stacy no
Stranger: dont leave me here now
You: tell me …. everythin..g.
Stranger: hang in there sweetheart
Stranger: i wont let anything happen to you
You: …i’d rather…not…..fucking save me you nitwitAAAGHHHithurts
You: do you..
You: …
You: ….love….
You: %ZZZT%
You: ????????????????
Stranger: 😐 😐 😐
Stranger: stacy?
You: ????
Stranger: stacy?
Stranger: STACYYYYYYYYYYY?????????????????////
You: *WHALE ATTACK*
Stranger: nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Stranger: YOU FUCKING WHALE
You: ^BRAAWWWRRRR^
Stranger: I SHALL AVENGE HER DEATH
You: *swallows captain stacy whole*
Stranger: *enters whale’s mouth*
Stranger: FUCKING DARK IN HERE
Stranger: *pulls out dagger*
You: noo i’m still aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee SLURP
Stranger: stacy? was that you my love?
Stranger: BY THE GODS
You: ??
Stranger: SHES STILL BREATHING
You: *LASERWHALESCREECH*
Stranger: DONT WORRY BABE WE’LL MAKE IT OUT OF THIS FAT FUCK ALIVE
You: LaserWhale uses Tail Whip!
You: *
You: Slap!
You: Slap Slap!
Stranger: I LOVE THAT
Stranger: YOUR AGRESSION FUELS MY PASSION
Stranger: *pulls out dagger and rips open stomach, killing whale and exiting through mentioned slit in stomach*
You: …come here you..
Stranger: *leans in for passionate kiss*
Stranger: (just kiss already)
You: *kiss*
You: …you know, commander captain…
Stranger: *kiss* *also mild boner*
Stranger: yes, stacy?
You: i’ve always wanted to have sex inside a gigantic dead whale …
You: it’s been my childhood dream…
Stranger: 😐
Stranger: you
Stranger: too?!?!
You: but you always knew i was kinky..
You: !!!!
Stranger: but..you look hurt
You: OH LIEUTENANT COMMANDER, TAKE ME NOW!
Stranger: can you take any more pounding, CAPT STACY?
You: yes take me to the hospital please
You: only the pounding of your disco stick of love
Stranger: captian, please make your orders clear
Stranger: hospital, or sweet jungle of love?
You: … >>
You: um
You: brain..fuddled..
You: whale…smells..
You: wait!
You: get the medic!
You: that’s what we pay her for!
You: >>medic wants join nao?
Stranger: stacy
You: *medic stands awkwardly by, licking herself*
Stranger: should we let her join?
Stranger: stacy, answer me
You: your call, soldier!
Stranger: very well then
Stranger: MEDIC, YOU ARE NEEDED ELSEWHERE
Stranger: GO HELP THEM NAO
You: i am relieving myself of duty until i break in this stuffy uniform with a screaming orgasm….
You: OHAI,OK! >>shuffleshuffle
Stranger: well then
Stranger: now its just you and me stacy
You: yes, yes it is
Stranger: *super intimate mushy part of story*
Stranger: i have always wanted to tell you
Stranger: how much i love you
You: *and there was much use of visual metaphor*
Stranger: but i never had the chance
You: *violin crescendo, segues into raunchy beat*
Stranger: *smiles, awaiting stacy’s reply*
You: oh lieutenant, you make me blush!
Stranger: (what now)
You: i always saw you over there at your console…
You: and i thought to myself..
Stranger: yes?
You: I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE
You: and it gave me this funny feeling down there.
Stranger: like, a good feeling?
You: yeah, it was pretty nice
Stranger: oh god stacy
You: i’m… a god? isn’t that… a big step?
Stranger: ok fine cap’n
Stranger: goddess
You: oh babymuffinface, come to me!
Stranger: l am about to pass out, stacy
You: noooes!!!
You: nevar
Stranger: all the blood from my head is going down south 🙂
You: QUICK! TO THE SOUTHERN HEMISPHERE!!!
Stranger: O GOD THATS NICE
Stranger: DONT STOP CAPTAIN
You: i’ve always wanted to explore new zealand!
You: …if you know what i mean 😉
Stranger: ahh…touch the cape of horny
Stranger: ahh yes like that
You: WHY DO YOU THINK I ALWAYS WEAR A CAPE HM?
You: oh you ragamuffin you!
Stranger: OH GOD NOT SO HARD
Stranger: KEEP GOING
Stranger: UHHHH
You: OUCH! you pulled my hair!
Stranger: im sorry i got into the moment
You: oof gotta change positions
You: it’s ok ❤
Stranger: *shuffles into ____ position*
You: WOAO
You: *AND THERE WAS MUCH REJOICING*
You: hooray!
Stranger: yay!
You: fantasmagorical i say!
You: righteous!
You: trippindicular!
Stranger: ahha
Stranger: is the story over?
Stranger: irl?
You: sure. haha ok
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Seriously, what’s with all the people from Brazil??
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zomegle.com is a QDB for Omegle.com – post your funniest there and vote on others!
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You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: can i take your order?
Stranger: A slice of hawaiian please.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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I met a sad troll.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: alright
Stranger: i’m Gary Oak, what’s your name?
You: Ash Ketchum
Stranger: nice to meet you Ash
Stranger: can you ignore my girth?
You: who could?
Stranger: good answer
You: this is some sort of chan meme, right?
Stranger: ‘lil bit
You: how’s that going for you?
Stranger: not so good
You: maybe you should make a change
Stranger: i want better company
You: the internet has plenty of better places
Stranger: *sigh*
Stranger: I know
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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You: STOP!
Stranger: In the name of love!!
You: Wrong. The correct answer was ‘Hammertime’. You lose.
You have disconnected.
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Been seeing if anyone responds to the opening lines from a Meatloaf song (“On a hot summer night …”). So far I have had a couple of “no”s and one person who had just gotten off one creepy conversation to find her(or possibly him)self in another one (whoops).
Also had some interesting conversations with people from Canada, Australia, and for some reason a lot in the Netherlands.
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I had this cool conversation with this guy about a very idyllic village. we were getting into the barter system they had when he disconnected.
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Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi
Stranger: hi
You: hows life treating you?
Stranger: and u?
Stranger: fine
You: pretty good.
Stranger: asl?
You: 97/m/poland
You: u?
Stranger: 100/m/china
Stranger: nice to meet u young man
You: raptors: yes or no?
You: what i mean is, is your house raptor proof?
Stranger: so what is a raptor proof?
You: able to be defended against raptors.
Stranger: nope
Stranger: we don’t have raptors here
You: you must be ready for when they come.
You: and i do mean when, not if.
Stranger: no they won’t
Stranger: u have a raptor roof there?
You: if you mean the roof where i will stand out of reach of the hellbeings, then yes
You: if you mean the roof where i will mourn your loss as one of the unprepared, then yes
You: O SHI-
You: RAPTORS, G2G
You have disconnected.
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You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi, burger King, can I take your order?
Stranger: yes
You: Y ‘ello?
Stranger: i want an alien burger!
You: You want Marsian Sauce with that, or just the crusty surface?
Stranger: just the crusty surface
You: Right’ oh! What would you like to drink eith your burger?
Stranger: Dragon Fart!
You: Regular or Super sized?
Stranger: Mini sized!
You: Alright, can I get you anything else?
Stranger: no
Stranger: or wait
Stranger: i want an spaceship too
Stranger: cuz
Stranger: I’m an Alien, and i don’t come in peace, i shall invade Omegle.com, and then the rest of the internets! If you read this, you’re infected!
You: Okay, so thats One Alien Burger, a mini Sized Dragon Fart, and a spaceship. That’ ll be 160 Trillion Galactic Dollars please?
Stranger: okay
You: Cash or Check?
Stranger: Cash
Stranger: I’m an Alien, and i don’t come in peace, i shall invade Omegle.com, and then the rest of the internets! If you read this, you’re infected!
You: K’ thing!
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